The Shit Never Ends

I had a fun day today. Started off with an appointment with my GP’s nurse and ended up with me having surgery (I had a biopsy, the Consultant said it was surgery so I’m gonna just go with it).

So yeah, like I told you the other day, I have this hole in my stomach. It has trebled in size since Tuesday, and the pain is getting unbearable. I took a trip to my GP this morning to see the nurse, who’s worried facial expression and her immediate summoning of the Doctor did not put me at ease. As soon as he walked in he told me to go straight to A&E. Second time in two weeks (and not for the first time).

When I got seen by triage they brought me straight through and so it began. 3 hours of tests, poking and prodding that left me feeling nauseous and light headed. I had one Registrar squeeze the shit clean out of the wound from 3 different angles, seeing if there was a pustule underneath or something. I almost fainted for fuck sake. The head went, the eyes got heavy, I think the fact I was lying down saved me on this occasion. On top of this I had to sit about without my bag/appliance attached for a good 2-3 hours, which makes me incredibly uncomfortable and with an immense feeling of vulnerability. And I was having to catch my shit with gauze. 

So the Surgical Consults were happy that it was superficial, and so sent me up to my long suffering Stoma Nurse Audrey. Audrey is brilliant. She was previously mentioned as the 5 foot tall woman I fainted (literally) on top of. Thankfully she’s seen almost everything but she wasn’t happy at all with this wound. It is near identical to the previous time I had it, only this developed in 4 days, as opposed to THE MONTH it took last time. So off she went to Dermatology to see if anyone was around and, thankfully, there was. Unfortunately the dermatologist was dumbfounded. 

She brought me down to a theatre in the Dermatology ward where I had to sit about for about 20 minutes (again, catching my shit) until everything was prepared for the procedure. A skin biopsy isn’t normally a big deal, but this one was of the wound I have and, as I’ve explained, this is right underneath my bag’s baseplate. It is also in the direct firing line of my stoma, meaning that shit could get at it quite easily, and cause major infection. But it needed to be done. Getting the local anaesthetic was actually worse (it was absolute agony) than the procedure, obviously because I couldn’t feel it.

So they stitched me up and sent me off home, no more the wiser than I was going in, and now thanks to the biopsy and the stitches in an incredibly awkward place, in even more pain. At least a weeks worth of worry ahead of me, because I don’t know what they’ll say or even what to expect. Thankfully though, it isn’t getting me down too much. Took today, and the last few, in my stride and haven’t had any of the “why me” “what’s the point” Existential bullshit that I normally do. So in that respect, I suppose in some kind of fucked up way, I did have a good day. Still pissed off though.

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